Monday 15th June 2015

So I took a drastic measure this week to help with my toothache, I took some metronidazole (antibiotics) that I found in the cupboard. I know you should not do things like that but I was in so much pain and I was really starting to think that I had developed an abscess. The funny thing is I took one tablet a day for a couple of days and by Friday the pain had completely disappeared..

Of course because I was feeling so down in the dumps with the toothache I turned to my guaranteed pick me up, online shopping. For a while now I have been thinking about getting back into painting and drawing so I purchased sketching pencils, charcoal, watercolour paints, paint brushes and watercolour paint paper. 

I am not amazing at art which I think is one of the reasons why I stopped but the thing is I find it very therapeutic, I become so engrossed with what I am doing that I forget about the pain and stress going on in my life. If you are struggling I recommend that you give art a go.


I also made another purchase this past week.

This is the very first time I have purchased an iPhone and I have to admit it took me a long time to make the decision to buy this phone because it was £539! I have always been an android girl but because I always hear people raving about the iPhone it has made me want to try at least one in my lifetime. I have now had the phone for 3 days and I am really happy with it but of course it is still early days but at the moment I wouldn't go back to an android.  


Previous post - Monday 9th June 2015                                      
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Disclaimer: What I did was wrong you should never take medication unless it is prescribed by your doctor. So don't take unprescribe medication.

Monday 8th June 2015

I am absolutely exhausted x 2, my parents were away from Saturday until today so that meant I was looking after my younger sister with Down's Syndrome and of course I had Miss Snowball the cat to look after too. I don't mind looking after my sister but every time I seem to look after her I am finding it more tiring, I really hope that this is just a sign of worsening anaemia and not something that is going to become permanent because that is going to be a serious issue.

Over the weekend I also developed this horrendous toothache or should I say root ache because that's all I have left of my top front teeth. The pain wasn't that bad on Saturday and it cleared up after one dose of paracetamol but I woke up in the early hours of Sunday morning in terrible pain and despite taking the maximum of dose of pain meds the pain is still there. I think it must be over a month now since I asked my dentist to refer me to the maxillofacial department to get these roots removed at the hospital but I haven't heard anything from either of them but that's not unusual when it comes to the National Health Service.


Previous post - Sunday 31st June                                           
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Sunday 31st May 2015

This week has been rough to the point that I nearly caved in and phoned the hospital so that shows you how bad things have been because this girl goes no where near a hospital unless I am really unwell or in extreme pain. You would actually think that after 15 and 1/2 years I wouldn't be so freaked out about going into hospital but I will happily admit that I am a big scaredy cat when it comes to going in. 

The main problem that I have been having are related to this stupid small bowel to cervix fistula, it has been leaking a good bit more so I am really hoping that it hasn't opened up a bit more again. It is really horrible when you move because it feels like you have peed yourself and even though people can't see it and can't see that it is leaking I get extremely embarrassed by it. I must always try to remember to stay positive and grateful because there is people in this world who have much worse fistulas then me. I have heard so many horrible stories and met some people who have it way worse and it really upsets me to see and hear what all these people are going through. 


Previous post - Sunday 24th May                                               
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Sunday 24th May 2015

It's been 4 weeks since I last wrote a post because there has been so much going on. Some things I can tell you about but there is a few things that I can't tell you about just yet which kind of sucks because I really want to tell you all.  

The Crohn's has still been getting progressively worse which is not what I want because I have so many plans and the last thing I need is to be really unwell and miss out on things. I also finally plucked up the courage to phone the dentist this past month so I am currently waiting for a maxillofacial appointment to come through. I seriously cannot wait to get rid of these disgusting teeth, roll on the day I get my new set of nashers (teeth).

I have also kind of came up with a really crazy idea and that is to climb Ben Nevis in the summer of 2017.

I honestly don't know how I am going to manage to do it. At the moment I can't even walk without having extreme pelvic pain and ever since I had henoch schonlein purpura I cannot put too much pressure on my legs because it causes a petechial rash but you've got to try new things and it's going to be for a good cause as I plan to raise money for the Crohn’s in Childhood Research Association and The Archie Foundation (the charity at my local childrens hospital. 



Previous post -  Sunday 26th April                                               
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Sunday 26th April 2015

So I have been quite upset these last few days and it's all due to not being able to have something that could or should I say would make my life better. 

If you are a regular reader of my blog you will know that a) I live in the UK and b) I suffer from major anxiety issues and have been battling with an anxiety disorder called agoraphobia for over a year now. In the UK there is currently no organisation that trains Psychiatric Service Dogs but this week I discovered an organisation called Service Dogs Europe which is based in the Republic of Ireland but supply highly trained dogs to all of Europe. 

You would not believe how elated I was when I found out that they served the UK but my elation was very short lived because when I told my family, who I have to stay with due to financial reasons said I could not have one. It really broke my heart when they said no because I felt that this is the only thing that is going to help me with my anxiety and agoraphobia, you would think someone would be happy and agree to something that is going to make your life better but obviously not. Also it's not like that pet therapy hasn't been proven to help me because since getting my cat Snowball my depression is better, I don't feel so alone anymore and I don't shut myself away in bedroom like I use to.  

All I can really hope for is that either they change their mind or I find enough money to move into my own place.

Previous post - Sunday 13th April                                               
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Sunday 13th April 2015

So I still have this stupid pain in my chest and despite putting my dose of  pain killers back up they aren't helping to dull the pain. I have actually been thinking about buying myself a tens machine to see if that would help with that the pain, the only problem is I personally don't know anybody that uses a tens. The problem with not knowing somebody that uses it means I am having do online research but of course you can't believe everything you read on the internet. It would probably be easier if I just went to my GP and asked him about it but would a GP really know much about a tens machine? 

Also this week I had a lovely reminder that a good number of people that I went to school with are married and that a few of them even have kids. The thing is it's not that I don't want to be in a relationship and to get married in fact I would love the happy ever after, it's just I haven't been able to find the right guy. It can be hard to find the right guy at the best of times but when you have chronic illness it can be a little bit harder. You need to find a man that isn't going to run away when things get tough because life certainly isn't easy sometimes and also it would help if he didn't freak out at the sight of blood or puke. 


Previous post - Monday 6th April                                              
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Monday 6th April 2015

So it's been a wee while since I last wrote and that is for a couple of reasons. 

If you read my previous post (16th March) you will know that I made the decision to stop taking my dihydrocodeine pain medication. I have to say the withdrawal wasn't actually as bad as I thought it was going to be but that was probably due to the fact that I decided not to go down the cold turkey route. I did originally think about doing the cold turkey route but after reading up about opiate withdrawal I changed my mind because I thought it was a bit too dangerous to do it by myself, so instead I decided to go from 4-5 tablets a day to 2 tablets a day. The main side effects that I had was feeling sick, feeling agitated, shivering and an upset stomach which meant I ended up with a higher ostomy output. The honest truth is the symptoms weren't any worse then a bad Crohn's flare, I don't know if what happened to me was normal because I heard and read so many stories about people being really unwell when they do this. 

Everything went well for the first week and half but I then developed terrible back and shoulder pain as well as pain all round my ribcage. :( I tried my hardest not to put my dihydrocodiene dose back up but in the end I had no other choice because things were becoming more and more difficult. It's not the first time time that I have had inflammation in my chest, I actually think I have had inflammation in every part of my body these past 15 and a 1/2 years but it's jso annoying that it had to rear it's ugly head when I was just starting out with reducing the dose. I really hope this current flare up in my chest doesn't last too long or trigger inflammation off somewhere else because I want to get the dose back down to 2 dihydrocodiene tablets a day as so as possible. 

Previous post - Monday 16th March                                                  
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