Tuesday 11th August 2015

So it’s been a week since our phone and broadband was cut off and it doesn’t look like it will be switched back on anytime soon despite my mother phoning them every day. It’s really ridiculous how my parents have been treated by this service provider; they have been with this company for 35 years and never missed a payment. My mum even explained to them how I had multiple health problems and require access to a phone at all times because if my health deteriorates I need to get in touch with the hospital, GP or even an ambulance ASAP but even that didn’t seem to make a difference.

It really is going to be a bummer that our internet won’t be back up and running before we move as I had planned to write a number of posts for my Being A Chronically Beautiful Girl and A Crohn’s Life blogs and then schedule them to upload when we moved because it will likely take a wee while for the internet to be set up in the new house. All I can really do now is write down the drafts on paper and when we get the broadband back type them up and post them.

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Saturday 8th August 2015

I have been struggling really badly with depression since Wednesday and it’s all due to our internet being cut off, how sad is that? I never realised how much speaking to other chronic illness warriors on Twitter and Facebook helped me, it definitely makes me feel less alone and isolated. There is something else that it has made me realise and that is I spend way too much time on sites like YouTube and World of Tanks. It needs to stop, I love to read and make things so I should be doing that instead of being on the internet all the time. When did I become one of these people who sits on the computer all the time? That’s right when the shit hit the fan and I became agoraphobic.

The final thing that having no internet has made me realise is I only have a couple of friends outwith the internet world. I can only blame myself for having no friends, I tend to avoid speaking to people because they always like to ask questions like how are you doing and honestly that is my most hated question because try as they might people without a chronic illness do not understand what we go through. People like myself with Crohn’s will never get better unless there is a cure and even if there is a cure the damage has already been done to our bodies.

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Friday 17th July 2015

So there are two main things happening with me at the moment can you guess what they are? If you guessed Crohn’s problems and anxiety then you would be right. The last thing that I need now is worsening health problems because I need to go through all my stuff and get it packed up for moving in 6 week’s time.  

My main issues at the moment are fevers and really bad fatigue. The fevers aren’t too big of an issue for me because they happen so much these days and usually after a couple of doses of paracetamol it settles down but when it comes to fatigue there is no medication to make it better.

I decided to treat myself to some new books this week because when we move house in August we are going to be without internet for a while which means I am going to have plenty time on my hands because I will not be able to work on any of my blogs. I purchased 5 books with 4 of them being fantasy books as I am trying to broaden my horizons when it comes to the types of books that I read. 

I mainly read what you would call Chick-lit books but when I am on goodreads or book tube (YouTube channels about books) I see so many people raving and recommending fantasy books so they must be worth reading.

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Saturday 5th July 2015

So I am finally able to tell you all that I am going to be moving house at the end of August, woohoo!!!!! 

I am still going to be living with my parents but hey what can you do when you are chronically ill and unemployed. I know that I sometimes complain about living at home with my parents but I honestly think I wouldn't be able to cope living by myself because on my sick days I can hardly do anything and it takes me all my time to go to the loo or take my medication when I am like that. I also don't think I would be happy living in on my own, as much as I love peace and quiet I am also one of these people who has to have some face to face interaction every day because if I don't those lonely feelings start to kick in. 

I have decided that I am going to treat this moving house like a fresh start. I have lived in this current house since I was 9 years old, I was living in this house when diagnosed with Crohn's and when I was at my sickest so there is a lot of bad memories here but there is some good memories too so it will be sad to leave. 

The thing that I most looking forward to about moving is my bedroom has an en-suite which is frickin awesome. Every house I have lived in since I was born has only had one bathroom and if you are a fellow IBDer you will understand how much of a problem this is but it will be a problem no more after August. 

Previous post -  Monday 15th June                                 
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Monday 15th June 2015

So I took a drastic measure this week to help with my toothache, I took some metronidazole (antibiotics) that I found in the cupboard. I know you should not do things like that but I was in so much pain and I was really starting to think that I had developed an abscess. The funny thing is I took one tablet a day for a couple of days and by Friday the pain had completely disappeared..

Of course because I was feeling so down in the dumps with the toothache I turned to my guaranteed pick me up, online shopping. For a while now I have been thinking about getting back into painting and drawing so I purchased sketching pencils, charcoal, watercolour paints, paint brushes and watercolour paint paper. 

I am not amazing at art which I think is one of the reasons why I stopped but the thing is I find it very therapeutic, I become so engrossed with what I am doing that I forget about the pain and stress going on in my life. If you are struggling I recommend that you give art a go.


I also made another purchase this past week.

This is the very first time I have purchased an iPhone and I have to admit it took me a long time to make the decision to buy this phone because it was £539! I have always been an android girl but because I always hear people raving about the iPhone it has made me want to try at least one in my lifetime. I have now had the phone for 3 days and I am really happy with it but of course it is still early days but at the moment I wouldn't go back to an android.  


Previous post - Monday 9th June 2015                                      
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Disclaimer: What I did was wrong you should never take medication unless it is prescribed by your doctor. So don't take unprescribe medication.

Monday 8th June 2015

I am absolutely exhausted x 2, my parents were away from Saturday until today so that meant I was looking after my younger sister with Down's Syndrome and of course I had Miss Snowball the cat to look after too. I don't mind looking after my sister but every time I seem to look after her I am finding it more tiring, I really hope that this is just a sign of worsening anaemia and not something that is going to become permanent because that is going to be a serious issue.

Over the weekend I also developed this horrendous toothache or should I say root ache because that's all I have left of my top front teeth. The pain wasn't that bad on Saturday and it cleared up after one dose of paracetamol but I woke up in the early hours of Sunday morning in terrible pain and despite taking the maximum of dose of pain meds the pain is still there. I think it must be over a month now since I asked my dentist to refer me to the maxillofacial department to get these roots removed at the hospital but I haven't heard anything from either of them but that's not unusual when it comes to the National Health Service.


Previous post - Sunday 31st June                                           
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Sunday 31st May 2015

This week has been rough to the point that I nearly caved in and phoned the hospital so that shows you how bad things have been because this girl goes no where near a hospital unless I am really unwell or in extreme pain. You would actually think that after 15 and 1/2 years I wouldn't be so freaked out about going into hospital but I will happily admit that I am a big scaredy cat when it comes to going in. 

The main problem that I have been having are related to this stupid small bowel to cervix fistula, it has been leaking a good bit more so I am really hoping that it hasn't opened up a bit more again. It is really horrible when you move because it feels like you have peed yourself and even though people can't see it and can't see that it is leaking I get extremely embarrassed by it. I must always try to remember to stay positive and grateful because there is people in this world who have much worse fistulas then me. I have heard so many horrible stories and met some people who have it way worse and it really upsets me to see and hear what all these people are going through. 


Previous post - Sunday 24th May                                               
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